Hmmm...I'm not really sure I wanna go 2 "church" anymore...
Why is it that I can find myself waiting for "church meetings" to finish so I can MEET with CHURCH? Is it just me that experiences this phenomena?
Don't get me wrong - I love my church brethren and consider myself truelly blessed to know so many wonderful people who have laid down their lives for me and many, many others. And what's more I don't see any other churches that I wanna be a part of - I think ours is the most forward thinking and radical in the area and I think it's got enormous potential and has a huge effect on many people.
And yet when it comes to Sunday morning I rarely bother any more to even try listening to the sermon - I take a book, a Mark Driscoll downloaded sermon, go for a walk or stay in Creche. We have maybe 15 mins of "good worship" (?!?). People's stories is perhaps the part I find the most life filled. And then of course notices and recruitment sign up adverts. And then we are FREE! To 'cup of tea' and grab the odd person for 15 minutes catchup in an overcrowded room. This isn't a complaint...just how I see it as I question my own walk, my actions and my use of time - the limited years, months, days and minutes God gives me.
I haven't always seen it this way of course. And it could be my attitude that sucks...may God show me.
I'd love to see more of people...but it seems most are too busy - doing church things....? Hmmm....
I found a quote that resonated with me - from Jim Palmer's "Wide Open Spaces"
"Looking back [to his time in church], I sometimes wonder if we really were a "community". Seems like what we were facilitating was mostly meeting-based relationships. People would attend services, classes, programs, and groups, but outside the scheduled meeting time, there wasnt much interaction between these people the rest of the week until the next meeting rolled around. When the class or group came to an end for all practical purposes so did the "relationships" (p.27/28)
TBC....
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